Sunday 31 July 2005

Prayers

FEMALE PRAYER

Before I lay me down to sleep,

I pray for a man, who’s not a creep,

One who’s handsome, smart and strong

One who loves to listen long,

One who thinks before he speaks,

One who’ll call, not wait for weeks.

I pray he’s gainfully employed,

When I spend his cash, won’t be annoyed.

Pulls out my chair and opens my door,

Massages my back and begs to do more.

Oh! Send me a man who’ll make love to my mind,

Knows what to answer to “how big is my behind?”

I pray that this man will love me to no end,

And always be my very best friend.

Amen.

MALE PRAYER

I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and a bass boat.

This doesn’t rhyme and I don’t give a shit

Amen

Saturday 30 July 2005

Got My New Video Card

My new XFX NVIDIA GeForce 6600GT arrived on Friday! I stuck it in my PC almost immediately, it would’ve been quicker if it hadn’t arrived in a very odd shaped box. Anyway… I fired up my PC and tested out the card, and it works perfectly.

It’s so nice to be able to actually play games again. Using a GeForce2 MMX was driving me crazy!!

Tuesday 26 July 2005

Roaming Is Evil

I got a call from Vodafone, my mobile phone network, earlier today. They were confirming that my phone hadn’t been stolen since there was some unusual activity on it.

This unusual activity was some large calls that were made abroad… over £550 worth! I was rather shocked by the size of my bill, as you can imagine. My bills are usually around the £30 mark each month. One call was over £300 alone! Made in the US, to Canada, from a UK based mobile. Whoops!!

Vodafone wanted to take a pre-payment immediately so I had to check what my bank balances were, luckily having just enough for what they were asking, and paid them £300 today. The rest will come with my normal bill next month, another 200 quids worth of calls.

*sigh*

I wish I’d never turned the roaming feature on now!!

But I’ve learned a valuable lesson… mobiles are flipping expensive when you’re abroad!!

Sunday 24 July 2005

Live Strong

Lance Armstrong has just sealed his seventh successive win in the Tour de France. He will now retire, at the top of his game. Just incredible really.

More here.

Saturday 23 July 2005

Rectal Exams

A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing a rectal exam:

1. “Take it easy, Doc. You’re boldly going where no man has gone before!”

2. “Find Amelia Earhart yet?”

3. “Can you hear me NOW?”

4. “Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?”

5. “You know, in Arkansas, we’re now legally married.”

6. “Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?”

7. “You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out…”

8. “Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!”

9. “If your hand doesn’t fit, you must quit!

10. “Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.”

11. “You used to be an executive at Enron, didn’t you?”

12. “God, Now I know why I am not gay.”

And the best one of all…

13. “Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there.”

Thursday 21 July 2005

A Few Tributes

I was at King’s Cross last Saturday and took a couple photos of the floral garden where people had left tributes and commemorations to those that had died in the 7/7 bombings.

Tributes To The Dead

Tributes To The Dead

Tributes To The Dead

More Attacks On London

3 minor explosions at 3 tube stations, and a bus has had its windows blown out in Hackney. The stations involved are Oval, Shepherd’s Bush and Warren Street where I was this morning!

All the explosions involved only detonators, and they went off around 13:11.

Only one injury is reported so far.

UPDATES: Latest from the BBC

The attempted bombings in London were designed to kill people, the head of the Metropolitan Police has said.

But Sir Ian Blair said evidence left at the scenes could be very helpful to police and added “the intention of the terrorists has failed”.

It is believed devices only partially exploded at four locations, three at Tube stations and one on a bus.

BBC security correspondent Mark Urban said initial indications were that the devices were put together in a way very similar to those used two weeks ago.

He said there were suggestions that the rucksacks themselves, as well as the choice of three tube trains and one bus as targets, all suggested a similar method of attacks.

There was also speculation that the devices were so similar to those used two weeks ago that they may even have been part of the same batch.

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